'Finding Relief' Category Archive

Posted on Sep 13th, 2006

There are two types of anxiety:

*Situational
*Existential.

Most of us experience both kinds.

Situational Anxiety

Common examples of Situational Anxiety that provoke an inner trembling are:

>Writing an exam,
>Asking someone for a date,
>The boss calling us into her office,
>Entering hospital for a serious operation.

This kind of anxiety is easily relieved with hypnotherapy. Situational Anxiety is a response to stress. Since you define what is stressful you can change your definition, and your response, with hypnosis.

That’s because your response to situations is under your control. The control increases the more you use your hypnotic capacities to create confidence and reduce anxiety.

Existential Anxiety

Existential Anxiety is universal. It is the frightened wondering we feel about:

>Why we are here,
>Why our time is short,
>What happens after death.

We deal with existential anxiety in two almost opposite, ways: by denial or by developing meaning.

Meaning lies mainly in the realms of philosophy and religion. Hypnosis can help you to find the meanings. It does this by helping you relax and use your imagination in creative ways so you can face your questions about the meaning of life.

Anxiety is nourished by negative thoughts and starved by positive thoughts.

Your imagination constantly sends messages to your internal organs. These chemical/electrical messages (hormones, for instance) influence your endocrine, nervous and immune systems. When the messages are calming you feel fine; when they are alarming, you feel anxious.

Hypnosis is your gateway to change those messages. Hypnosis enables you to deal with the symptoms of anxiety, or to get to the root cause.

That is, you can use hypnosis to better control your worrisome thoughts, stomach upset or clammy hands. Or, with hypnosis, you can uncover the root of your particular anxiety.

Karl became convinced he was going to die of a heart attack. He frequently suffered with chest pains and the feeling he was about to pass out.

Karl became anxious about his anxiety. Numerous doctors examined him and declared him physically healthy. Finally, one of the physicians referred Karl to a hypnotherapist.

Relaxed in hypnosis, Karl rapidly became aware of the origin of his anxiety: his father had died the year before from cancer and Karl felt not only that he had behaved irresponsibly toward his sick father, but guilty that he had wished his mother had died, instead of his father.

With Karl in hypnosis, several sessions of psychotherapy on these issues calmed his responses and enabled Karl to come to terms with his feelings.

Feelings of anxiety can arise from organic and physical causes. These possibilities must be explored before you concentrate on psychological causes.

Organic reasons for anxiety can be any disease or organ malfunction that sends alarm chemicals rushing through your body.

Physical causes range from smoking cigarettes to drinking colas.

Rose wanted to be less nervous when she entered public places such as restaurants.

Her hypnotherapist taught her how to relax into hypnosis. Then he used one of his favourite techniques for the control of anxiety: the Comfort Measure.

He asked the hypnotized Rose to picture a measuring device such as a thermometer. She chose to imagine a ruler. The hypnotherapist suggested she see the ruler marked off from 0 to 10. Ten represented the most discomfort and 0 the least discomfort, or the most comfortable, that is, no anxiety.

The hypnotherapist asked Rose to read off the comfort level she was experiencing at the moment. She said "Six."

Then the therapist asked Rose to see how far down she could push the line marking off her comfort level. When she reported the marker was down to 3, the therapist congratulated Rose and asked her how she was feeling.

To Rose’s astonishment, she felt quite relaxed. From then on Rose could, and did, use this method to feel comfortable in public places.

Your feelings are under your control, providing you use your imagination, and not solely your willpower. Like Rose, you can learn various techniques (such as slow deep breathing) to lower anxiety levels both in and out of hypnosis.

Hypnotherapy will also help you to change the anxiety-arousing messages that float automatically into your head.

At the door of a restaurant Rose used to be flooded with the certainty that everyone would watch her enter; she would blush deep red and people would notice how much she was perspiring.

These self-fulfilling prophecies were replaced during hypnotherapy with positive affirmations.

When Rose enjoyed the results of these post-hypnotic suggestions she further enjoyed the increased self-control they gave her. A virtuous circle had replaced the vicious.

Copyright (c) 2005 Bryan M. Knight

Dr Bryan Knight is Canada’s foremost hypno-psychotherapist. His 200+ page website "Hypnosis Headquarters" offers solutions to scores of issues such as phobias, stress, panic attacks and overweight. "From Victim to Victor: Overcoming Childhood Sexual Abuse", is one of several articles that women in particular could find useful. Ebooks, CDs, DVDs and mp3 downloads can be discovered at http://hypnosis.org/women.htm

Posted on Sep 5th, 2006

Stress is a fear that some resisted experience will happen unless you control something is out of your control.

For example, you might be facing eviction unless you can pay your rent. And you don’t have any certain way of making an income.

Or you might be in danger of experiencing the wrath of a person who explodes for no apparent reason.

Or you might fear condemnation and there seems to be nothing you can do about it.

The keys to unraveling this are one or more of

* Let go of the resistance. One way to do this is to feel the feeling associated with the resistance and then loving the feeling. You will be amazed at how effective this can be.

* Communicate with the people in the situation. Get yourself in a good mood before contacting the person / people. It might help to write out what you’re going to say. There is no need to try to memorize this. The idea is to clarify your thinking. Then you can discuss the situation in a friendly manner. You might find that the person is helpful and comes up with solutions for you.

* Learn more about the area, e.g., get more training in the subject area so you can get more control.

* Pray. This isn’t presenting a wish list to God. You can simply ask for God’s help.

* Turn everything over to God. Be willing to accept whatever God sends your way.

* Put the situation in a different context. You might consider the situation to be a thrilling challenge.

* See what you can learn from the situation. Then move forward with your new knowledge.

If you keep doing one of more of the above on a regular basis, you’ll expand the quality of your life. Why not give it a try?

Copyright 2006 by Jim Kitzmiller

Jim Kitzmiller conducts self improvement workshops and retreats. He is the author of a home study stress management class.

Posted on Sep 4th, 2006

Are you having trouble getting rid of your anxiety and stress related problems while taking care of the kids? It is not easy to manage your anxieties, however here are some techniques a person can use to help conquer their stresses and other anxiety related symptoms.

The first step is that you should talk to a professional who can get you started in the right path of getting better. Getting help from a counselor or other professional is very important and can provide you much help and insights in dealing with your current problem.

A good way to manage your anxiety is to challenge your negative thinking with positive statements and realistic thinking. When encountering thoughts that make your fearful or anxious, challenge those thoughts by asking yourself questions that will maintain objectivity and common sense.

When overwhelmed with worry, a person may encounter a lot of scary thoughts coming at them all at once. Instead of getting upset, remember that these thoughts are exaggerated and are not based on reality. From my interviews with various professionals, I’ve learned that usually it is the fear behind the thoughts that gets us worked up. Ignore the fear behind these thoughts, and your worry should decrease.

Sometimes, we get stressed when everything happens all at once. Instead of taking it out on someone else a person should take a deep breath and try to find something to do for a few minutes to get your mind off of the problem. A person could take a walk, listen to some music, read the newspaper or do an activity that will give them a fresh perspective on things. This mental timeout can help you refocus on your current situation.

Another thing to remember is that things change and events do not stay the same. For instance, you may feel overwhelmed today with your anxiety and feel that this is how you will feel the rest of the week or month. This isn’t correct. No one can predict the future with 100 Percent accuracy. Even if the thing that you feared does happen there are circumstances and factors that you can’t predict which can be used to your advantage.

As a Layman I realize that experiencing a lot of anxiety can be difficult. The next time it happens remember to apply some of these techniques you recently learned. The key is to be patient and not to give up. In time, you will be able to cope with your anxieties.

Stan Popovich is the author of "A Layman’s Guide to Managing Fear" an easy to read book that presents a overview of techniques that are effective in managing persistent fears and anxieties. For additional information go to: http://www.managingfear.com

Posted on Sep 3rd, 2006

Ever had a week, or month or how about a summer that was so overwhelming, so chaotic that you simply didn’t know where to start to get back on track?

You may not have any control over the thing (or things) that set off the chaos but you still have to deal with the ramifications. Often on top of the physical presence of the chaos there is also internal emotional turmoil that suddenly boils up from who knows where.

For example, this is going back to school time. For those of you who have young kids it often means the end to summer…sanity is around the corner. But for those of you whose kids are "coming of age" it may mean they are off to college and that could mean they’re moving out of the house and sometimes out of state.

Regardless of how often you thought you’d be glad when the day came that they were leaving…now that it’s here it can be a real emotional ringer. I’ve got several clients that feel like they are on an emotional rollercoaster for just this reason.

Added to that emotional turmoil is the feeling they have left so much undone during this time, they don’t know where to start.

Or maybe you’ve been away for close to a week attending your company’s annual event. You’ve been exposed to a lot of information. You’re excited and rearing to go. But you’re feeling overwhelmed. "Where do I begin" and feeling behind in your day to day life. So what do you do…often we do nothing.

Neither of the above examples are what train wrecked me this last week. But that is exactly how I feel overwhelmed and on an emotional rollercoaster. What caused the sky to fall for me? Technical difficulties.

My email account (Outlook) went down and I’ve been unable to access any of my files nor can I get or send emails. This is huge for me as I do a lot of my business using email. Believe me for the first couple of days, the sky was falling.

Loosing my folders would be awful and being virtually off line for a week has sent things into a real tizzy.

I felt so far behind that it seemed I’d never catch up and I was really at odds as to where to begin.

Where do you begin when this happens?

This is what I did and I hope the process helps you. I made a list of all the things I could think of that were lurking out there playing on my mind. All the things that were left undone while the distraction was taking my time…this newsletter was one of them. It was "due" on the 15th and here it is the 18th and still not out.

Once I got the list of projects in front of me that were undone (and making me crazy) it was easier (and much less frightening) to choose the first one to do.

In this case it was the newsletter. I decided that was my first project.

Did that fix everything?

No, I’m still behind and feeling angst (and Outlook is still not working right). So the next thing I did was stand back a bit and take a look at how I was dealing with the situation.

Here is what I heard, "You need to tell those Microsoft guys that you’re out of time, and they need to do whatever it takes to get this fixed." Clever huh, do I really think these guys are not doing everything they can to fix this problem? Here’s another gem, "Everything is still sitting there, when will it get done. You’re going on vacation next week, how can you do that with this mess?"

What I heard was all the negative chatter reinforcing how far behind I was and all the things that I "should" be doing. It became apparent that this was a job for the "Tom and Jerry" solution. For those of you who don’t know the Tom and Jerry solution see my ezine # 6. It was time to "thank it for sharing, flick it off my shoulder and listen to something constructive, something positive."

Don’t be so hard on yourself

And this ladies and gentlemen is really the entire reason for this article. So many of us think we are supposed to "get perfect" and stay that way. When the real trick is to recognize when you are off schedule, off kilter or in anyway out of sorts or out of focus … and simply come back to focus.

As soon as I decided I was going to put the "distraction" on the back burner (even for just a little while) and focus on something I knew I had control over, things began to clear for me.

Oh the negative chatter didn’t stay away very long - at first. But what did happen immediately, I was able to refocus much more quickly. So the amount of time I was "spinning" doing nothing of real value got shorter and shorter.

And that’s the trick. It isn’t how much is undone, or how long you’ve been off track, that really makes for failure. What trips us up is not coming back to focus.

Everyone gets off focus. What makes for success is to keep coming back.

And here’s one last thought on that. Come back congratulating yourself. Yep, congratulating yourself.

You have a couple of choices in this situation (at least). You can be really annoyed with yourself for "being off focus again." Or you can congratulate yourself for recognizing you were "off" and bringing yourself back.

Which do you think will be the most productive? (Let’s see, is the glass half full or half empty?)

Remember the hash mark exercise from the last ezine and try that here. When you realize you’re "off focus" add one of those hash marks to your collection. But do with congratulations for being aware that you were off focus.

What happens as soon as you are aware you’re off focus?

Right, you back on track.

Be good to you when things out of your control suddenly take over. And as soon as you can, take a break from the chaos and do something that moves your life forward. The chaos will still be there waiting for you…(or maybe not) when you return to it. Recap of steps

In its essence pretty simple really:

1. Stand back from the situation and make a list of everything that is undone

2. Pick something that’s important to you from the list. (Everything important? Choose something you can complete fairly easily and quickly.)

3. Using the Tom and Jerry exercise from ezine #6 and break the negative chatter pattern.

4. Congratulate yourself for recognizing when you’re off focus. Great job, you’re aware!

I’d love to hear how this works for you, please email me and let me know.

May all your hassles be little and your (re)focus strong! :)

© 2006 Jillian Middleton All rights reserved.

Jillian Middleton is a Mentor Coach and Trainer, and author of the courses ‘5 Steps to Working Less and Making More in Network Marketing’ and Setting Up Your Store Hours. As creator of the ‘Savvy Sponsoring Strategies’ Program, Jillian trains network marketers and direct sales consultants the same strategies she used to build two 6-figure network marketing businesses in 5 years. For more information on Jillian or her programs visit http://www.SavvySponsoring.com.

Posted on Sep 2nd, 2006

Do not let your anxieties and stresses overwhelm you while taking care of your family. Sometimes it can be difficult to overcome your stresses, however there are ways of dealing with your problems. Here is a list of techniques that a person can use to help manage their daily stresses and anxieties while being a parent.

In dealing with your anxieties, learn to take it one day at a time. While the consequences of a particular fear may seem real, there are usually other factors that can not be anticipated and can affect the results of any situation. Get all of the facts of the situation and use them to your advantage.

Sometimes, we can get anxious over a task that we will have to perform in the near future. When this happens, visualize yourself doing the task in your mind. For instance, you and your team have to play in the championship game in front of a large group of people in the next few days. Before the big day comes, imagine yourself playing the game in your mind. Imagine that your playing in front of a large audience. By playing the game in your mind, you will be better prepared to perform for real when the time comes. Self -Visualization is a great way to reduce the fear and stress of a coming situation.

Many times we get overwhelmed with many different tasks that we face. When this happens, a person should take a deep breath and try to find something to do for a few minutes to get their mind off of the problem. A person could take a walk, listen to some music, read the newspaper or do an activity that will give them a fresh perspective on things. This will help you to refocus on your present situation.

Take a day to relax. Being a parent takes a lot of work nowadays. Take the day off and do something you enjoy and let your spouse take care of the kids.

As a Layman, I know that our anxieties and stresses can be difficult to manage. The better you can manage your stresses and anxieties, the better off you will be in the long run.

Stan Popovich is the author of "A Layman’s Guide to Managing Fear” an easy to read book that presents a overview of techniques that are effective in managing persistent fears and anxieties. For additional information go to: http://www.managingfear.com

Posted on Sep 1st, 2006

Stress is predominant in our society. Most of us are running here, running there, doing something at high speed, seldom relaxing. And they thought they were living busy lives a hundred years ago!

"This strange disease of modern life with its brisk hurry and divided aims." - Matthew Arnold (1822-1888)

To improve upon this stressful way of life we can reassess our values and routines. If possible, we can eliminate some of those things which are not necessary to a contented life, and we can slow down. Achieving a stress free way of life will help keep us healthier and living longer and make our time here a lot more fun.

You can often visualize your way out of tension by picturing yourself in a very calm, peaceful, serene setting, in complete easy control. Picture it clearly and hold on to it. You can use your imagination in many different ways to help siphon off tensions - when at the bathroom sink or in the shower, let all your worries, stresses, anxieties, run down the drain with the dirty soapy water.

When you start to feel stress coming on, immediately try relaxing the muscles and fill your mind with thoughts of peace, tranquility, confidence, strength, happiness. Repeat these and other calming words to yourself now and again. Take notice of, and enjoy your surroundings all through the day. Look at, listen to, smell the limitless variety of things natural everywhere.

Make a determined effort to please someone. Offer help, agree, smile. This is much easier than trying to impress others, or trying to be perfect. Thinking of, and interacting with others, can be very soothing on the nerves, particularly if you expect no credits.

"The American over tension and jerkiness and breathlessness and intensity and agony of expression are bad habits, nothing more or less. Tension is a habit. Relaxing is a habit. And bad habits can be broken, and good habits formed." - William James (1842-1910)

© Read Ken McIsaac’s 32 KEYS About Life at http://www.32keys.com or his articles on marketing and consumerism at http://www.axiom.ws/unethical/.

Posted on Aug 31st, 2006

Accidents and tragedies often happen to us when we are not expecting them. They are the unpleasant and even horrendous experiences of life. How can we deal with them when they happen and how can we prepare for them before they happen?

On Thursday 12th January 2006, I head butted a pile of chairs. I was pursuing a student with a fake knife to help him learn how to evade a knife attack. He evaded brilliantly.

As I missed him, I tripped and crashed to the ground falling heavily on my knees. My progress along the floor was stopped as I rammed my head into a pile of chairs.

Blood was dripping from my head to the ground and I felt as if I had been in a car crash.

My first thought, as a motivational writer, was: "What is good in this situation?!"

There was a lot. I still had my eyesight even though things appeared a little fuzzy and I still had intact knee caps. It was also the end of the lesson so no one could ask for their money back!

The scar that would be left on my head for a while would give me street cred as a martial arts instructor. When you are too old to look beautiful it is better to look tough.

The incident also gave me first hand experience of looking on the bright side. This viewpoint is always worth describing since so many humans have to face the dark side of life on a regular basis.

It is a commonplace that when you are in an accident or other stressful situation, you can relieve stress by considering the positives.

Crashing to the floor, will make me a better instructor. I will take better care of my students and make sure that they are not wearing the wrong footwear (as I stupidly was) and are not over committed (as I stupidly was).

I can also take the incident as a warning to be more careful in future in everything I do that involves risk. I will make sure I always wear a seat belt even for short car journeys. Accidents occur when you are not expecting them. The least you can do is be prepared for them.

I was moved by the support of my students. One insisted that he would take me to hospital. I told him I was fine and, in the end, I just drove myself home. I preferred an early night to hanging round in a chilly hospital full of dodgy bacteria.

Two of my black belt instructors phoned next day to check up on me and one of my more recent students emailed me to see if I was OK. Even her mum was concerned. Such support can definitely cheer you up in times of stress.

The incident allowed various talents to emerge. One of my students was a vet who did a great job of patching me up.

My sister commented on how cheerful I was after a good sleep. I would not have been so cheerful if there had been permanent damage to my eyes or knee caps.

It is easy to recover from an unpleasant incident where there is no permanent damage. Just realize the fact that things could have been much, much worse and take steps to avoid a repeat performance.

Being cheerful is not so easy if you suffer permanent damage but again the principle is the same. Look for the positives.

Many people are worse off than you or me. Christopher Reeve suddenly became worse off than billions when he fell off his horse. And even Christopher could have been worse off than he already was if he had suffered brain damage as well as paralysis and if he had not had the support of a loving family.

Money usually helps in any tough situation. One reason I have started an internet business in info publishing is to be able to help any member of my family if they need special treatment or care.

The old are too often treated with too little respect. If they have plenty of money in their old age, the respect is still there.

Having plenty of money cannot replace having good health but it can certainly alleviate your problems when you find yourself in a stressful situation.

Money is a great stress reliever! Being able to pay for any expensive drugs you might need can make a huge difference.

We need to make plenty of money while we are still able to. Even a minor accident can severely limit the power, focus and energy you need when you are trying to make money.

Age, too, can sneak up on us with unexpected health problems and increased stresses. Let’s focus on the best but also spend some time preparing for the worst.

Thorough preparation for the future is a great stress reliever and there is no time like the present to start preparing.

If you are not yet in a stressful situation, make sure you are ready for it if and when it comes.

Another way to deal with stress, even the worst kind, is to see the funny or unexpected side of it. Joan Rivers is famous for relieving stress by looking at the funny side of age, death and even suicide.

At a performance in England, she was almost in tears as she remembered the suicide of her husband and the way the news came first to her fifteen year old daughter, Melissa.

Melissa felt especially upset as she had been the last to speak to her father on the phone and had not realized what he was planning.

Joan felt she had ‘lost’ Melissa until they had a meal in a restaurant together. Joan daringly relieved her daughter’s stress by commenting:

"If daddy were alive and saw these prices he would kill himself all over again."

Melissa smiled for the first time since her father’s death.

Many people are currently stressed by the fear of bird ‘flu. Joan, typically, sees a benefit in this situation:

"Something wonderful has happened. We are all going to die from bird ‘flu, so we can eat what we like."

About the author

John Watson is an award winning teacher and fifth degree black belt martial arts instructor. He has recently written several books about achieving your goals and dreams.

They can be found on his website http://www.motivationtoday.com along with a motivational message and books by other authors

Ezine editors / Site owners

Feel free to reprint this article in its entirety in your ezine or on your site but please include the resource box above.

Posted on Aug 31st, 2006

There are times in every person’s life when things do not go according to the way we would like. All of us have our ups and downs. These can consist of periods of poor health, emotional problems, financial struggles, relationship challenges, accidents and the like.

Understand that these challenges are normal. We simply cannot exist in a "bubble of happiness" all of the time. It would be nice but life doesn’t work like that - for anyone.

When things seem to be going poorly, there are two basic options open to you:

  1. withdraw inside yourself and sink deeper and deeper into depression, probably weakening your ability to deal with future challenges.
  2. work through your troubles as best you can and try to emerge out the other side, probably making yourself stronger and wiser for the experience.

Robert Schuller, a famous clergyman and prolific author, wrote a book which he aptly titled: "Tough Times Never Last, But Tough People Do!" (ISBN: 0-553-24245-8). In his book, Schuller says: "Name your problem and you name your possibility." It is a book about faith and strength and hope. He encourages readers never to surrender.

When things go wrong, as they invariably do from time to time, try to "hang tough." Bad times always pass, eventually. You just need to see them through.

Like the light of day always follows the darkness of night, good times will be just around the corner for you.

[If you like this article and would like to use it on your own website or ezine you may do so ONLY if the article is not changed in any way and the final paragraph: "About the author", with all links intact, is included.]

About the author: Gary Simpson is the author of eight books covering a diverse range of subjects such as self esteem, affirmations, self defense, finance and much more. His articles appear all over the web. Gary’s email address is budo@stressmanagementarticles.com. Click here to go to his Motivation & Self Esteem for Success website where you can receive his "Zenspirational Thoughts" plus an immediate FREE copy of his highly acclaimed, life-changing e-book "The Power of Choice."

Posted on Aug 30th, 2006

Breathing is something we all do during our life time. We all know we are going to die if we are not breathing. Breathing is a reflex action done by our body to provide the flow of oxygen around the body to the vital organs.

Wikipedia, online encyclopedia, describes humans breathe between 12 and 20 times per minute, with children breathing faster than adults.

Babies may breathe as much as 40 times per minute. Adults normally breathe about 500-700ml of air at a time. An average 14 year old takes around 30,000 breaths per day.

However, we can control our breathing. We can be more relaxed by breathing in and out so deeply. The more we allow our body to be filled by deep breathing, the less stress we place on our body and mind.

The more we practice our deep and controlled breathing, the more natural it becomes and we can call on it at any time of day to help us through those tired or stressed out moments.

With all the problems we have — either we feel stressed out at work, or at the end of a long hard day and we can’t sleep, or if we just want a few minutes to our self — we will find this simple breathing exercise really beneficial.

Here are some steps to do breathing exercise:

1. You can lie down, sit down or stand up as long as you are comfortable. Breathe in slowly through your nose to the count of four. Breathe very deep until all your body feel expanded.

2. Hold on that deep breath for four counts, and then exhale slowly through mouth to a count of eight.

3. Repeat the breathing in – right down so your tummy expands. Hold on to it and then exhaling nine more times.

4. You can breathe deeper once you get used to the above steps by leave one hand on your stomach and place the other lightly across the chest. Breathe right down so your tummy expands

5. When it can’t go any further, breathe in some more and fill the tops of your lungs. Inhalations and exhalation are the same length, eight counts each, without holding in between.

6. When you exhales, let the old air out from your chest then from your tummy. So, you are going to be relaxed.

Riana C Lance writes about health in some publications. Twice a week she informs her health tips and knowledge in a newsletter. Subscribe to get your free twice a week newsletters so you can stay healthy for the rest of your life from http://Healthifica.com

Posted on Aug 29th, 2006

How can you manage your phobias and other related fears while being in a relationship? It can be tough to be in a relationship and have to deal with your fears and other phobias.

One of the ways to manage your particular phobia is to find out what exactly is your fear. If you have trouble finding out what that fear may be, then try to talk to a professional who can help you figure out what the fear may be. Once you know what the fear is, then the next step is to find the ways to deal with that fear.

For instance, one of the ways to manage your fear is to challenge your negative thinking with positive statements and realistic thinking. When encountering thoughts that make your fearful or anxious, challenge those thoughts by asking yourself questions that will maintain objectivity and common sense. For example, your afraid that if you do not get that job promotion then you will be stuck at your job forever. This depresses you, however your thinking in this situation is unrealistic. The fact of the matter is that there all are kinds of jobs available and just because you don’t get this job promotion doesn’t mean that you will never get one. In addition, people change jobs all the time, and you always have that option of going elsewhere if you are unhappy at your present location. Changing your thinking can help you manage your fears.

Sometimes, we may be nervous doing a certain task that may be scary. When this happens, visualize yourself doing the task in your mind. For instance, you and your team have to play in the championship hockey game in front of a large group of people in the next few days. Before the big day comes, imagine yourself playing the game in your mind. Imagine that your playing in front of a large audience. By playing the game in your mind, you will be better prepared to perform for real when the time comes. Self Visualization is a great way to reduce the fear and stress of a coming situation.

When facing a current or upcoming task that overwhelms you with a lot of anxiety, divide the task into a series of smaller steps and then complete each of the smaller tasks one at a time. Completing these smaller tasks will make the stress more manageable and increases your chances of success.

As a layman, I realize it is not easy to overcome our phobias. Remember that sometimes our worrying and fears can make the problem even worse. Take things in stride and try not focus too much on the problem. In time, you will find the ways to overcome your phobia. If you have trouble, talk to a professional who can give you additional insights on your situation.

Stan Popovich is the author of "A Layman’s Guide to Managing Fear" an easy to read book that presents a overview of techniques that are effective in managing persistent fears and anxieties. For additional information go to: http://www.managingfear.com

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